Category Archives: Brexit

“Just slip out the back, Jack,  Make a new plan, Stan,
Don’t need to be coy, Roy,  Hop on the bus, Gus,
Don’t need to discuss much,  Just drop off the key, Lee.”  
June 28: Gold $1315.30 down $7.20.  Silver: $17.84 up 10 cents
July 5: Gold $1356.40 + $19.70. Silver: $19.87 + 33 cents

This is last week’s post.  Due to a major computer malfunction, it didn’t get sent.  So, onward.  Further troubling events include the following “news” items:

British property REITs have frozen themselves today because some investors want to redeem their shares.  Rots of ruck with french aristocracythat.  How can you have “liquidity” in a REAL ESTATE trust?

The FBI has announced that due to, I don’t know, sun spots, the ghost of J. Edgar Hoover in his best dress pleading for a real female, or possibly corruption at the highest levels of our country, that they will recommend that “No charges are appropriate against Hillary Clinton” for her failure to maintain security for her Top Secret files on her personal computer.  Since when does the FBI get to decide who gets prosecuted?

Here’s last week’s piece:

London resident Lindsay Lohan “tweeted” to her 9.2 million followers to remain.  “Good luck with the pound,” she said.  “Will take you about 15 years to get it back up.  BREMAIN instead.”  With those sorts of comments by political commentator Lohan and others, I can’t imagine why the Brits left.

The massively distorted campaigning that led up to last week’s vote finally ended.  It was BS all the way.  As of Friday, when the votes were counted, the British populace voted to leave the European Union.  The vote was relatively free of Bremain contamination. That was thanks to the 10,000 volunteers who learned from the recent Scottish Secession vote that “boots on the ground” at the polling places were necessary for a fair count.

And now the split-up settlement talks begin.  Cadfrey Michelson, California divorce lawyer extraordinaire, is on his way to defend John Bull in his hour of need.  The EU has retained Al Gore, who has agreed to renew his Tennessee Bar License in order to, as he said it, “Represent the interests of the aggrieved spouse Europa.”


Former Vice President Gore’s name was thought by the European powers to indicate how the EU wanted to handle the British after the vote.  (Former Prime Minister Cameron, a lawyer whose feelings on the vote were well known, was not thought to be available for the defense, due to…hibernation.)

Attorney Michelson indicated he would be seeking a restraining order to prevent Europa from making off with offshore assets, such as the French terminus of the Chunnel.  Michelson indicated that the continent was already showing “bad faith” by churning the financial markets and trying to hurt the bastion of British sovereignty, the British Pound.

Bull claimed alienation of affection, and “intolerable regulation” from a third party located in Brussels.  Also, excessive visitations from the continent leading to cohabitation were another sticky wicket.  Gore said the Brits would go the “End of the Queue” forever.  Which queue was not specified, although there were thought to be a few billionaires there who might also have been adversely affected.

One of the issues in the case will be custody.  John Bull’s son Scot (with one “tbillionaires“) has indicated he wishes to live with his mother, the EU.  Another child, NorIre, has said she might want to go along as well.  Michelson said that John Bull, of course, wanted custody of his children.  So, there may have to be an ancillary proceeding to determine custody.”  Michelson said the interests of the children should be paramount in any divorce proceeding.  He was heard to mutter “They are our future,” although Michelson does not have children, and had not met Scot or NorIre when he spoke.

Michelson also noted that, “While the property settlement is obviously the most important aspect of this case, there should still be due consideration paid to the other parties affected by this difficult disunion.”  It appears a few other families living nearby are so upset by the divorce proceeding, that they may ask for divorce as well. That would be Netherexit, Frexit, and Portugo.  A somewhat distant family in Italy has been dysfunctional for some time, so it’s not known if they will ask for a divorce or merely an accommodation in a mental institution.  In fact they just asked for $5 Billion from the ECB.  I believe they were given $120 Billion, just to tide them over.

Michelson had no comment about the financial market maelstrom that continued into the new week. He did indicate that the repercussions would eventually pass.  “A cheaper British currency should allow some benefit to British manufacturing, and certainly tourism.  And you’ll be glad to know,” he said, “that a cheaper pound will not affect my fee.  I’m being paid in gold.”


And that’s the news from the continent.  Let the healing begin.

Final Note: the thing with “derivatives” is an aggrieved party has 14 days to receive additional “collateral” in case it looks like the paying party won’t make good…on, say, a currency derivative.  Let’s also say a large German bank made a lot of bets on the stability of the British Pound…that went down 8% last week.  So, watch your knitting after this Thursday, July 7.  Markets bremained stable for a 10 days or so after Lehman went down in 2008.  Then…AIG, and a few others went kablooey.

Silver just passed $18.50, which was the techies’ sign that the hunt is on.  Could be a lot of fun, if you own any.

Michael McGowan
The Financial Foghorn